Day 2

OK so I have no internet connection, but I'm in Rüdesheim. It is now 10:30pm local time, 4:30PM Sunday afternoon EST.

Let me start by saying last night instead of sleeping, I watched the fireplace channel. Yes. I went to bed early, and was up about 2 hours later because I can't sleep in strange beds. Something about it, just can't do it. I think I got maybe 3 hours all night. I also hate hotel sheets. They seem like they are 50% synthetic material, 40% isolation and about 10% wax. They feel completely gross against my skin, so I have to go to bed fully clothed to actually make a dent in my sleep.

You can quote me on this...

"Bedsheets... if they're anything else, they're not flannel!"

So after Mainz, I got up earlier than I wanted to, even though I wasn't really sleeping anyway. I had a wonderful “Hotel Shower”... LOVE hotel showers! The water is always extra hot and extra powerful! The towels suck no matter where you are in the world though. They're too small and always seem sort of waxy... kinda like those stupid sheets!

So, I got to the dock for the river cruise extra early because Kelly misjudged the time, but whatever, it was a nice morning with overcast clouds and some itsy bitsy spits of rain. One of my favorite kinds of weather. :)

I met a few people waiting for the cruise, a mother and daughter from Seattle Washington, I kept looking for an opportunity to throw in “I LOVE YOUE MOVIE!” but never found it. Rent it, I highly recommend it. Then I met another couple from China who's son is living in Germany for work. They kept asking me a lot of questions about myself but never asked them about their selves.... so they automatically filled in for my stupidity. (really though, I just wanted to be left alone, I was grumpy and tired and didn't really care about meeting people that early in the morning on no sleep). Actually it was usually in awkward situations too though, like the bathroom or a too-small elevator when he wanted to talk to me. If you ever meet me in the bathroom ignore me, cause I'll be doing the same to you. I don't think bathrooms are the best place to catch up on life. Bathrooms are a simple business exchange. You go in, make your deposit, wash your hands and get out leaving no trace that you were even there.

Besides, I'm kind of a jerk when I don't get sleep. SO LEAVE ME ALONE! :)

We enjoyed the 3 hour long cruise to Rüdesheim. Very beautiful landscape, old castles and more of that Qubec crap that I talked about earlier. Plus a couple bardges worth of scrap metal on it's way somewhere to be dumped. We had some “wonderful” breakfast aboard the “ship”, Kelly had some low-fat cheese sandwich that came with a half-pound of butter already spread on the bun, tomatoes and cucumbers and salty ham. She could barely eat it. I asked the waiter if they had maple syrup... here's how it went down:

Him: Sorry I don't understand.

Me: Maple? Syrup? You now... Syrup? Only made with maple?

Him: SOUP?

Me: AH! Nevermind! Kann Ich habe the scrambled eggs and ham bitte?

Him: Yes, coming right up!

OK so I forgot that Germans have a different way of doing meat. It came to the table, it looked wonderful! I bit into it and almost choked to death! The eggs were fine, but the ham was sooooo salty! It destroyed the entire edibility of the whole thing. It was honestly like eating a salt-lick with some eggs! Oh my gosh and the ORANGE JUICE!!! They don't sweeten their orange juice! It was 90% sludge and pulp with some orange flavoured water. I ate everything because I did order it, and I knew that arguing with Germans in their own language would be a lesson in overcoming frustration. I just need to vent about it though... It was only eggs for frig! How do you mess up EGGS!?

Whatever, breakfast done, next lesson to be learned.

We soon came to Rüdesheim. Let me start by saying I LOVE this little town. Wonderful, Beautiful and full FULL of history.

When we finally LUGGED our luggage to the hotel room, (ask me about this in person, and I'll tell you a story about Kelly and I arguing about her knowing everything about travel and wishing for her death on a stick), we were about 5 hours too early for check in. So we stored our luggage at the hotel and went for a scenic tour of the land. In the short 5 hours walking the streets of Rüdesheim I learned to love Germany. It has more history in one block then Canada does in its entire existence. There are these streets that are beautifully cobblestoned and some old romantically crafted buildings of old stone that date back close to the 1500's. I saw a bunch of wine presses that out dated Canada! It is truly beautiful.

Then I went on a cable car ride of the wineries. Again, amazing to see the difference between Picton wineries and ones that have been around for about 700 years. Even the streets have various grape plants that are probably older than Canada growing in them. I have some pictures I will post somewhere to show you. I still need to figure that out in the blog settings.

OK so I don't know how to explain this one detail but I will try by starting with a title.

“European Bathrooms!”

I have never in my life met a culture so bizarre about bathrooms. The first Hotel in Mainz had a glass door for a bathroom door. Hey everyone! I'm peeing! Yeah-ha-ha!

Secondly, Rüdesheim, they had PUBLIC PAY TOILETS! If you had to go, you drop a couple euros into a slot and you get to relieve yourself! If you're short on cash, you pee your pants. Simple math.

Then there is this two-button flush game in the wall (Yes, you flush in the wall), One button that's big, another that isn't. I pushed both of them to see what happens and I can't tell the difference! I know it's a mind game and I'm losing! Then there is the way it flushes. In Canada it has a nice swirly effect causing all the contents to nicely get sucked down the hole never to be seen again. (See earlier note about leaving no evidence) Here, there is a tilde-wave of water that magically comes from nowhere (They don't have back-tanks) and nothing actually goes down the hole! You have to press those stupid buttons in some random combination to leave no trace! Grrrr!

OK OK I know TMI, but I had to tell you because it is very frustrating.

I visited a couple museums and have some pictures and videos of it. I don't think I could ever explain what I saw as well as the video could, so stay tuned for that.

At the end of the day just before going back to the hotel I saw a sign for a Scottish Pub!!! OH MY GOSH How did I miss that the first 20 times I passed it? Anyway after getting directions I found it about 4 blocks away. I went in really excited and about 30 seconds later left completely disappointed. They were playing Barbie Girl and the entire place was full of chain-smokers! (By “Full” I mean all 9 of them). I don't think Barbie was Scottish, but whatever.

OK so final note about today, I'm not sure if you can even understand this point, but it hit me all of a sudden. There are no screens on any of the windows! The main reason? NO MOSQUITOES!!! Then I remembered one of my favorite people in the world telling me this before. Not only is there no mosquitoes, but bugs in general are very scarce. I think Germany just won some HUGE brownie points from me! I don't know how they did it, maybe mosquitoes hate the taste of Germans. My only guess is they probably taste like salty ham... I get it mosquitoes, I really do.

:)

OK I'm a day behind in my blog, I'm going to attempt one more for today's adventures, but if I don't get it finished, please stay tuned.

Mmmmmwah!